EP 51 | I Don’t Know About You, but F!k What People Think!

💥 Yup, we said it... lovingly, of course. 💥

In this episode, we go all in on what it feels like when your growth makes others — especially family — uncomfortable. From navigating rejection to choosing yourself even when it’s hard, we share how we’re learning to stop shapeshifting and start honoring our truth.

We talk about the guilt, the emotional tug-of-war, and those moments when you wonder, “Am I too much now? Or just finally ME?” This one’s for all our Deep Divers out there who are growing, evolving, and done watering themselves down to stay likable.

🙌🏽 THANK YOU for tuning in and diving deep with us — every listen, every share, every DM means the world to us. We see you. We love you. You’re not alone.

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Transcript

EP 51 | I Don't Know About You, but F*!k What People Think!

 Hey guys! Welcome to the Deep Dive In podcast with Nancy and Brenda. We got to stay and we are back, baby. Hey deep diver. I hope you guys are having a great day. If you're listening in whatever day it is, I hope your day has been beautiful so far. Has your day been beautiful so far? So far? Yeah, I got to go to this new coffee spot and that always makes me happy. You do love a coffee spot? Yeah. So July 8th, that'd be like eighth, everyone. Wait. I remember we were saying yesterday how people are like, oh, it's Halloween season. Yeah. It's like, well, it's only July. But I get it. Some people are obsessed with Halloween and that's the next holiday, I guess. Yeah. It's understandable. Are you a Halloween person? Um, honestly, not for the decoration or anything, but dressing up, I think is pretty cool. Yeah, and I love to see, like, the girls dress up. Oh, yeah. Costumes. They pick. That's really the only reason why. Yeah. That's true. Yeah. You. Um, yeah, I feel like. I feel like I do have Halloween spirit in me. Mhm. Um, and it's funny, now we're talking about Halloween and like. If you're just tuning in, we're talking about Halloween in July. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah I think I am I think I'm more, I'm more than I portray to be. Yeah. I wouldn't have thought I was going to I thought you were going to be like, not really. Yeah I think I am, but at the same time, I'm also that person that doesn't like I, I feel like it's a made up holiday for us to consume more. Yeah. And I'm just I've become a non consumer. I feel or I'm becoming a non consumer. So it's kind of like uh. Yeah. Stuff. You know that's how I feel with Christmas because I love Christmas. Yeah. And um and I want to buy all the things and stuff. Yeah. All the little toys. Yeah. And then I'm like, oh, maybe not. I guess I could just spend this money on gifts. That's smart. That is 100% smart. But any who. Yeah. Any who? Any who. Um, you know, I wanted to talk about something that happened recently, and it's been on my mind ever since it happened. And I think this is a good topic to talk about, because it has to do with, with when we're changing as a person. I feel like there's a lot of it's not only you changing as a person and changing like your beliefs and stuff, but there's also family and friends and people obviously that knew you a certain way. Mhm. That kind of don't identify with you anymore or like. Feel some type of way because you're changing. And that always reminds me of this meme. And it's like a R, it's a, it's a butterfly and it's a caterpillar and a butterfly. Yeah. And then the caterpillar tells a butterfly like, oh, you've changed. Yeah. And the butterfly is like, we're supposed to always remind you that. But anyway, like something that happened recently and it was obviously it was somebody close to me, and, uh, we were having me and you were having a conversation. We were at an event and place with, you know, family members and stuff. Me and you were having a conversation with someone, and this person came to get the person that we were having a conversation with. And he says, I'm paraphrasing because I kind of vaguely remember him saying it, but it's still like stuck in my head. Well, he said, like, get away from them. Like, don't like buy into their bullshit pretty much. Or buy into their stuff. Yeah. And we were having a great conversation and talking to this person, asking him about his success story. Yeah, yeah. And asking him, you know, what are some things that he's had to, you know, maneuver through and. They have had the struggles that he's gone through and stuff, right? As a Hispanic person, being successful, owning a venue and like all of these things. Right. Um, and we were having a deep conversation with this person. Somebody close to me came and said, like, yeah, don't fall into their bullshit. As if we're like a cult or something. Yeah. And it was crazy to me. And this person that said, this is very close to me. Um, and I kind of just don't want to say, like, who it is because I just don't. And, um. And it's been with me ever since. Why do you think? Uh, because I really. I've always cared about what this person. I, uh, yeah, I guess I always cared about what this person thought of me. Yeah. And it's. And it's crazy because this is why it's crazy. Because I felt we were grown out of that. Uh, I thought we were grown out of that. I used to. Aha. We're past that. Yeah. I thought we were past the. Oh, you're, you know, making fun of each other, making fun of each other. And like, I, you know, I thought we were past that. I thought we were at a point where we're just going to support each other for whatever we do in our lives, okay? And or like, not admire each other, but like, you know, support each other and whatever we do. And it was crazy to me to, to hear that, you know, from somebody I, somebody I highly respect. Right. And I think it goes with, you know, the transition like changing. That's one of the reasons why I feel a lot of people have a hard time changing because those things are going to happen. Yeah. Like it's going to happen that you're going to make people uncomfortable. Yes. And then this person we were having the conversation with. He's like, no, no, hold on. I like these conversations. Yeah. Like, bro, we were just having a conversation about, you know, whatever. Yeah. And it might have been that this person just wanted to, like, you know, get drunk. You know, party in the situation that we were in. Understandably so. But I don't think it's right for somebody to say that. Yeah. Especially if it's somebody close to you. I agree. For them to say, like. All don't buy into their bullshit. And that kind of like, is disrespectful in a way. Yeah, because it's kind of communicating to the other party like that they that you are not thought highly of in what it is that you do. Yeah, exactly. And I also think to add to what you're saying is there's like a sense of loneliness in this evolution that we go through in life. And there's also, um, these are actually I think it was shortly thereafter we hung out with some friends, and the friends asked us, like, does your family support you and what you do? Oh yeah. Right. And, um, and sometimes it's like people that are closest to us, whether it's family, very close friends or whoever, um, that are our least supportive supporters. And I told I told them I was like, you know what? I think the only two people that are truly supportive, that are close to me as like, family would be my mom and sister. And, uh, they're truly the only ones that really support me and that I could actually share things about, uh, with. And I think it's not just you and I. I think it's actually a lot of people that they do not receive support from the people they think that they should be receiving support from. It's so true. I mean, it. It got me thinking because like I said, I thought that we were past that, right? Like. And first like, I it's crazy to me because of what was said. But then I'm understanding. I'm understanding that person's point of view of me. Right. Yes. So it makes me understand like, oh, they still see me like little Nancy doesn't know what the fuck she's doing or, you know, talking her nonsense. Yeah, because I've always been this way. I've always. I've always gone in deeper in conversations. I've always. I've always said the things that are uncomfortable to people. Like. Yeah, always. Ever since I've met you. Yeah. I've always. I've always been this way. Um, when you first started talking to me, you asked me the best question. I just always address the elephant in the room. Yeah. Is I feel what I like, how I've been. I've always been that way. Um, and for somebody to be like, oh, don't fall into their bullshit, you know? Whatever. Like it's. It's very interesting to see or to know because I know where that person's mindset is at. Mhm. Um, which is no shame or whatever, but it sucks because now I feel like now it's up to me whether I want to be around that person or not. Mhm. You know, and make that decision and it sucks because it's somebody that I love deeply. Mhm. And somebody I obviously grew up with very closely. And it's like damn now I have to now I have to make this decision for myself. Yeah. But I didn't want to make but unfortunately it is what it is. And some people are just not made to be there to support you or be there to understand. Yeah, they're on their own journey. You're on your own journey. And sometimes those journeys don't clash and it sucks. It's it really sucks to go through that. That and I can understand why in some cases it's very hard for people to change because they're still around the same people that keep them down because they're scared to be alone and they're scared to lose the people that they love and they don't want to. And so you stay in the same circle. Because of that? Yeah. And it can also be seen as a they're they want to keep us down. Uh, where they're at. Right. Whatever. Um, but it could also be seen as maybe they are a part of your journey to help elevate you to that next place in your life. Because maybe, um, you have to learn how to set this boundary, because setting boundaries is a part of energetic cleansing. It's like making sure that you have the good vibes, right? Yeah. And setting boundaries allows maybe setting the boundary with that person needs to be done now, because later on down the road, you are going to need to have that boundary for whatever else is coming your way. Yeah. Right. And although we may not understand it, and it may be very difficult for us to even think of placing that boundary, um, it's essential for our upliftment in our journey. And it's kind of like it's. But this also goes hand in hand with, like, our childhood, because it's how we handle that rejection And in a sense, not feeling chosen by that person that you looked up to so deeply and that you still look up to so much. Right? And so it's like how it's acknowledging that that stems from somewhere in, in our childhood. And then it's understanding, okay, well, how am I going to respond now? Which is where you're at right now. Yeah. Like I don't want to do this right. I don't want to set, like, do whatever set whatever boundary it is you have to say. Yeah. Like I don't want to stop talking to that, like to them and stop hanging around with them like they I really don't. Mhm. But I also know that they, they see me a certain way and I'm not going to stand for that. I'm not just going to let somebody share their opinion of me and then continue to be like whatever. Right. Right. Passive. Yeah. Because then I'm not giving myself that respect. Mhm. I'm not being respectful to myself and my worthiness like I'm worthy of that person's respect. I've done nothing wrong. Mhm. I've just been who I am. Mhm. And for whatever reason it wasn't. It's not accepted. Yeah. It's not accepted. And I sometimes I think about it like maybe it's triggering for that person in a way. Possibly. You know. Yeah. I mean, I mean, really like the conversations that I had are literally conversations about, you know, people's achievements. Yeah. You know, or sometimes even with that person, it's like asking them how how things are going like. Yeah. And it's like not a conversation that they want to have. Right. Which is interesting to me because it's all surface level interactions. Right. Like let's just get drunk and that's it. Mhm. Really there's no deep conversations. Um, for someone that's deep like I am like it's very crazy. But obviously this is, you know, a very close person to me. So it's not like I could completely not hang out in the same vicinity as, as this person is. Right. So but it's it's hard. It's very hard to I would say like go through these changes and. Go into the life that you want to live and be the person you want to be because of these close relationships that you have and that people you know don't see you in that light that you see yourself in. Yeah, they still see you as who you were and and the mistakes that you've done and all of those things. And they and it's just like people not giving you the benefit of the doubt. And I feel like everybody deserves the benefit of the doubt. Like everybody deserves to evolve. Everybody deserves to change in whatever way that they want, even if it doesn't resonate with me. But people don't understand that. And I think that's why we have the division that we have in today's world. Yeah, is because people don't understand the other person. Like everyone goes through their own journey. Mhm. That every person wants the other person to do what they want them to do in order for that person to feel happy and that it's like me telling you like, oh, I need you to do this so that I can be happy. Right. And it's not it's not a sustainable way of being like, you're responsible for your own happiness. Yeah. Because you're teaching that other person, like, well, you need to do what I'm telling you. So you're teaching them to people. Please. In order for them to receive, like, likeness and whatever else. Right. And, and that's sometimes that's what people do to us is they want you to be how they want you to be so that they can feel good about themselves and but screw you and how you feel. And so it's it's crazy because I, um, I don't know, like, I just feel that, uh, a lot of times as we evolve in our life and, and go along our journey, the people that don't support us, it's because it's triggering something within them. And they choose to instead, like, say those things like that. They said. Right. Yeah I agree. And I'm sorry. Go ahead. And I think that, um, the that is that expression of ourselves and however it is we choose to express it, whether it's through deep conversation or through the way you come across to other people, the way you dress, whatever however you choose to look and like that is a form of expression. And I feel that when it triggers other people that that is the opportunity for them to be like, oh, why am I like this? Yeah, but a lot of people don't know to do that, right? They don't know how to be self aware, but all you can keep doing is expressing yourself in that way because that is raw and authentic. Nancy. Yeah. Is however it is that you're choosing to move through this world. Like, I know, for me personally, whenever I do show up in. A certain way that I feel triggers people. I'm like, dude, that's not none of my business. Like, that's all you. And so, like, if you choose to feel that way about me because I'm being this way, like, that's I don't know, man. Like, that's something you need to look in. Yeah. I mean, at the end of the day, I feel the most important thing that you can do in the journey that you're in and whatever journey that you're in is, you know, letting people be who who they are. Yeah. Um, but you also, as you're evolving and you're being aware of how people are being triggered by your change in life, um, like you, you also need to be aware that, like, that's happening, um, and letting it go, like, yeah, letting go. What I mean by letting it go is letting go the like what what caring. Caring about what other people think about you. Yeah. Um, and I think this, this precise event or circumstance that happened for me. It's it it's helped me get to that. Like, oh, that's crazy. This person, you know, still thinks this way of me and like, I don't care. Yeah. Like, it's it's brought me to a place of, like, letting it go. Yeah. I don't care what you think about me. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm actually doing the opposite of bringing a different perspective to the world and in hopes it could possibly, you know, help somebody. Right. Um, but I think that's what happens. I think when you change, it triggers people, just like you said. I agree with that. It triggers people because they're staying the same. Right. So the triggering comes from they're like, oh they're changing. Mhm. And sometimes they just see the changes a negative because it's not because they're not changing. Yeah. They start telling you like oh you think you're better than me. Yeah. Like or like people see you working out and they're like oh I need to start working out. I'm like, nobody told you. You need to start working out, bro. Like, I'm just sharing with you that I'm working out. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's what it is. Because at the end of the day, naturally, I feel as a human being we are always changing and we are always in the wanting to change. But because of all of these things, carrying what people think about you or it's too hard, or all of these things that we put excuses on, we don't change. And that's why if you stay the same and you see somebody else changing, that's what's triggering, because in reality you want to change. Yeah, yeah. It's a human evolution. Yeah. Yeah. In reality, you want to change. So that's why it's triggering you. Yeah. Because you are not. You're choosing not to. Right. So I feel like that's what happens. Like. People just get triggered because they in reality want to change and not necessarily to be the person. You know, they see the other person being, but we're just we want to do new things. We want to as a human being. Like, that's just in our nature. Yeah. Our expansion to learn new things to, you know, like experience new things, travel somewhere, take up a new hobby or whatever the case may be like. We are literally wanting to do those things as human. But if you stay the same and you're not evolving and you're not changing, you're literally going going against your own want. Yes. As in in nature, like as a human being. Yes. Which is crazy. Your what your soul really wants. Yeah. So really wanted to change. To be different and to evolve and be an awareness and whatever the case may be like, take up a new hobby or whatever, and to the greatest potential of who you can be. Because I think humans have such potential. But we don't get there. We don't because we get stuck in this, you know, societal. Yeah. I mean, but that's like that's another thing. Um, but at the end of the day, it means choosing yourself. Yeah, it means choosing yourself over the opinions, over the thoughts, over the projections that other people make towards you. Um. And that's what makes you happy. Honestly? Yeah. And I think that's been the hardest thing for me in, uh, my change, my transition and and the things I want to, uh, in the life that I want to live. And the person that I want to be in this life has been that I has been letting go of, um, caring, um, of what people and certain people like, I don't care what everybody thinks about me, but I do care like what my immediate family thinks of me, right? Uh, so if that becomes like a thing like that, that's been the most challenging because it's like, I don't I don't want to just. I didn't want to disappoint them. Right. Because it's a child thing. It's a child. An inner child thing. Yeah. I didn't want to disappoint them. I didn't want to, you know, say something that was going to embarrass them because that was always me. I was always the one that would said something to embarrass everybody. And they'd be like, shut up, Nancy. Like, yeah, don't say that or whatever. So now, like, I don't give a fuck. Like I don't care. Like it's it's who I am, right? And that's what I've suppressed. And I realize with this happening, I realized, uh, I mean, I've let it go, like I think before. Um, but this just kind of solidified, like where I was at of being able to let it let go of what they think of me. Mhm. And let go of, you know, the criticism or embarrassing them or whatever. Like, I don't like I don't care anymore. It's not that I don't care. Actually, I should just say that it's not that I don't care. It just, it it just I'm choosing me. Like I'm not embarrassed by it. You're not gonna let it take, uh, take precedence over what? You. Yeah. I'm not going to let it take precedence over what? What I want to be. And following my truth and my authenticity. And at the end of the day, I feel like my authenticity and bringing that to light and and sharing that with the world is going to allow me to accomplish what I want to accomplish in life. Yeah. So I'm I was literally like, blocking myself from those accomplishments because I cared about what other people think thought about me. That's huge. Yeah. That's huge. Not just for you, but for anybody who's listening who also feels the same way. Like that. They can't express themselves 100% because of these opinions or thoughts of other people. Yeah. And. While you're listening to this. If those people come to mind. Like, those are the people that, you know, 100% have, in a sense, power over you because you are giving them your attention. You are giving them your thought like, oh, what are they going to think of me? You are giving away your energy to that person simply by the mere fact that you're thinking about what they're going to think about you posting this, or saying this, or acting this way, or being this way. Right? So yeah, and it's true. And it holds you back. Yeah. It holds you back completely. I, I, for one can say that it held me back from like, posting stuff or like really pushing our podcast, for example. I feel like that's been one of the reasons why, like, I didn't want to feel like a cringe is the word that everybody uses, right? Like feel cringe. Um, in the stuff that we talk about is usually like stuff. Like personal stuff. Yeah. And it's interesting because I've had that comment before, you know, like when I brought up having the podcast and one of my family members and I think I shared this before, one of my family members was saying like, oh, I don't want to really listen to it because I don't want to hear stuff that's like, uncomfortable or like it's yeah, you know, it's weird for me to listen to. I'm like, well, it's my life, so not yours, you know? Yeah. Um, but that's where it comes from. And it comes from like it comes from caring what other people think, but at the same time sabotaging my dreams because I am caring what other people think. Yeah. And like, who cares? Yeah. You can't let yourself down. That's the thing. You can't let yourself down. And, um. And continue to. To not like follow your your dream to. Yes. Because you because you do think like even though like I didn't I didn't know that me caring what other people thought was stopping me from posting. Like I didn't know that. Right? Like initially it was just like like it it wasn't even something that I was thinking about. Yeah. Like, oh, um, and then you. And then like, I kept asking myself like, well, why don't I, why doesn't it come natural to just post, you know? Yeah. Then you start digging into these things and it's like, oh, and then what? The situation that happened made me think about it more and I'm like, oh, that's why I don't like go into it. That's why I don't post as much because I'm still thinking, like I'm making people uncomfortable. Yeah. And I'm like, fuck that shit. You know, I lock them all, babe. Lock them all. I don't want to fuck. I'm not that I'm not a blocky type of person. I really am not. Yeah. You really aren't. Um, yeah. You know, you brought up the word cringe, and I. Uh, my Reiki teacher, she sent an email out today, and she said that this whole month is the time where people are going to start. Like, if they really are aware, they're going to start speaking out. And she and in her email, she even put, this is a good time to speak up, speak your truth, put your ideas out there, risk embarrassment and cringe and get started. Yeah. The world needs your genius, your art, your heart. And that's where we're at as a society right now. And I think the people that really do that and like, go all in into sharing and speaking their truth and being who they are without caring about what people think about them, they're going to see the result in like a very small amount of time. And um, so go be cringe, babe. Imma be cringe, guys. Catch me on my cringe TikTok even though it's just life stuff. Yeah, like it's just, you know, things that people should know, I guess. Coming from a different perspective. Life like, yeah, it's so interesting. But I mean, that's again, it's one of the things that keeps us back. Mhm. The biggest thing I feel is what keeps us back from doing what we want to do, because let's just say it's not even about posting on social media or whatever. Right. Let's just say it's about taking a certain job or changing your career or leaving your job because you don't want it anymore. Mhm. You make those decisions. Those decisions are based off of what people think about you. Yeah. Whether it be whether it be your immediate family. And sometimes it is your immediate family. Most of the time it is your immediate family. Yeah. Like, what are my parents going to think about me? What are my siblings going to think about me like, yeah, this is a good job. This is like a an amazing opportunity. But I don't like it. Right. And some and you just get stuck doing it because you're caring about what other people might say. Yeah. Deep down below, it turns into judgement and shame to oneself. And as women, I think it's just something that women carry very deep down inside. They begin to like, think of the judgment that they're going to receive from those people that are very close to them. Yes. Placing that judgment upon themselves. And then they begin to place that shame upon themselves to like, who am I to think that I could even get a better job? Yeah. Who am I to think that I even can start over my career at 40? Yeah. 50. Right. Like I'm already old. Yeah. Like, they they they begin to place these, these feelings on them unknowingly, by the way. And I think it's just it just sucks because it's obviously a society that has conditioned women to to think this way, but. And that's so true. And they and I see that because the other day I was noticing, like on my TikTok, um, you know, some guy like you see guys posting, for example, on TikTok, sometimes they post like some crazy shit. Yeah. And sometimes they're just, like, scamming people, like, with no shame. Yeah. You know, and I'm like, Holy shit. You know, and I feel like. And I, I've always felt this at the same time because I feel like, um, in with my bro. I saw this with my brother. Uh. I thought he never gave a fuck. Like he always just did his thing. Yeah, he never give a fuck. Like we would go to a party and he wouldn't care to, like, get a present to go to the party and, like, you know, like, yeah, stuff like that. Like you just. I mean, that's probably like, the least of the night. I mean, the fuck. But that's the only example that came to mind. But he just never gave a fuck. But he just did whatever he wanted to do. Yeah. And his to his right. Like to his right he did. And I always admired that of of him. Um, because he always just did what he did. He, he was a fuck it, like, let's go. Um, type of person. He never give a fuck about what anybody thought about him. Mhm. And it was very like, uh, like I always saw that and like, holy shit. Because I didn't feel that way. Yeah. And I'm like, how the fuck does he do that? Right. Without feeling fucking embarrassed. Yeah. You know, how does he do that? But yeah, I mean, it makes sense because my dad was like that. My dad was like, I don't give a fuck. He's going to do whatever he. He was a black sheep. Black sheep of his family. Like, he didn't give a fuck about what he did, but my mom gave a fuck. Yeah. And so I so that's where it comes from. Like, I, I don't have that non shameless attitude because I'm a woman. Yeah. And I'm like, what the fuck man is deep in there. Um, honestly, just post the thing. Just get the new job, get the new career, start over. Do whatever it is you feel like doing and be like the fit brother. Yeah. Just go for it. Like my brother. Fuck it. Let's go. Yeah. It's true. Like it's true. And to a sense, I tried to be that way. And some. And sometimes throughout my life, I try to be that way. Um, I try to be the, like, fuck it person, but I still cared. I still, like, cared what other people thought of me. So in my in my life right now, in in this day and age, I feel, um, that's I like I completely I'm aware of being in my own power and being in my own worth. And it's like like, who gives a fuck what anybody says or whatever anybody thinks and what you do and where proudly I think it's it's one of the things that I've actually actually been working on myself is wearing it proudly. And what I mean by that is like whatever you choose to do, like wear it proudly. Mhm. You know, like us, you know, wanting to go in, wanting to do like our podcast and wanting to um, you know, you holding space for people and doing sound healing and breathwork. Um, and me wanting to, like, be a content creator and going into, um, you know, creating my YouTube videos and stuff, like, I was, I was kind of like, you know, when the conversation would come up, it's like, oh, this is when I'm like, shy about it, you know? Um, and it's one of the things that I was, I became aware of for myself. It's like, okay, I chose this life that I want to create and the life that I want to live, but I'm still embarrassed by it, and I'm still holding back the embodying part because of that embarrassment, because it's not something people understand. Yeah. So I'm still kind of like, oh, I don't want to make people uncomfortable. Yeah. And then, you know what I thought, like, um, and now I'm just like, no, like, this is what I do. This is what I am. Yes. And I don't give a fuck what you think. I hope you don't think anything bad, but I hope you understand. But if you don't, it doesn't matter to me, right? You're. I don't need your validation. Mhm. At the end of the day, like. You don't need your anybody's validation but yourselves. Mhm. As long as you're not doing anything bad and you're not hurting people or whatever, like you do whatever you want to do and you don't need anybody's validation or you don't need to step on fucking eggshells and stay quiet because you don't want to make people uncomfortable. Yeah. And I'm saying this, I'm saying this because I've said this to myself. Oh, wow. And this is a conversation that I've had with myself because I felt the opposite of. Right. Yeah. So I've had to had these conversations with myself in order to get to where I'm at right now and embodying the the life that I want to live, no matter what I, I choose to do. Yeah. Like, I'm going to embody it and I'm going to wear it proudly no matter what. No matter what anybody says, as you should. Once again, guys, thank you for listening. If you gain something or feel inclined to share this episode, please do so. Go to our Instagram Deep Dive In podcast. That's dive in the I v I n and connect with us there. Comment share. Post. We appreciate the support so much and we will catch you on the next one.